There's a basic theory of comedy that coupling the sacred with the profane is usually a good way to find the funny.
As Writers’ Room Guru Brent Forrester puts it: “Most jokes have at their core, a contrast between the sacred and the profane.”
The High and The Low in contrast:
Religion, old people, babies, funerals...
...combined with sex, the toilet, violence, rock and roll etc. etc. etc.
So for example, urban hip hop breakdancing (PROFANE) cute babies (SACRED) -- is funny.
(like in ‘that’ water advert).
Z
They’re also a good way of generating moments of super nobility
(angelic choirs singing hymns on mountain tops)
or super evil...
(illuminated advertising street bins).
I’m trying to keep lists of The Sacred and The Profane, and bank them all right here.
SACRED Old People Funeral Classical music Statue War hero Nobel prize Literature Archaeology Babies Pregnant Mums | PROFANE Rock star Porn Star Fly hole Faeces Noise Pollution Drugs Thieving Urine Blow job |
SACRED Infant school Teacher Recycling Saving energy Sterilizer Royalty Princess Prince Queen King | PROFANE Spying Secrets Exhaust Goths Bikers Motorcycles Debt Cess pit Portaloo Loud music |
SACRED (Michael Landon/Angel) Clergy Bishop Priest Angels Choir Art Gallery Library Museum Playground Church | PROFANE (Tattoo of Michael Landon = Sacred and Profane) Skid mark Brown mud Fertilizer Bad smell Prolapse Colostomy bag Flood Tattoos Soot Smoke |
SACRED (Golden/Model) Golden Head Office Hymen Fashion model Catwalk Nature Summer’s day Breast milk Humanity Rose petals | PROFANE (Golden/Model+Toxic = Sacred and Profane) Toxic chemicals Explosion Bombing Bulldozer Prison Ink stain Bottom Guns Robots Thorns |
SACRED (Soil/Earth/Loam) Grandparents Birth Progress Hardback Novel Poetry Opera Nursing Toddlers Soil Cottage | PROFANE (Translation: Garbage Truck) Abortion Ban Video game Advertising Jingle Swearing Skyscrapers Rubbish Truck Wrought Iron Sponsorship |
So a Virtual Grandparent Video Game is sacred & profane,
double sacred is a hardback poetry book, or toddlers making progress,
and sponsorship on a rubbish truck is doubly profane...
SACRED Mountain tops Backing singers National costume Nursery rhymes Cycling Family love Romantic love Shared experience Self respect Love of humanity | PROFANE Baseball caps Banking Brick viaducts One night stand Torture Illuminated advert dustbins Soiled hands Sauce Fast food Boardroom |
So from these wrongs... a family hug in a boardroom, a burger and chips up a mountain top, a group shared moment of torture...
Doubly profane, having a one night stand on an advert dustbin...
doubly good, backing singers on a mountain top and the bicycle made for two.
(A carpark. Profane.)
Nursery Love which endures Philanthropy Paddle boats Crops Silence Brotherly love Home cooking Cancer survivor School project | Annual results Mega-trucks Tobacco Litter Conveyor belt Multi-storey carpark Jumbo 747 Toilet paper/tampons Serial Killer Reality shows |
So... from these tiny lists, sacred and profane:
A reality show set in a nursery (which C4 are doing with "Secret Life of 4 Year Olds")
Loving a serial killer (death row dames)
Giving away free toilet paper
and
School projects to grow the best tobacco.
A toddler (sacred) who is a pig (profane) makes the Babe stories and films (Sacred and Profane).
Palace Ice sculpture War monument Paralympics Native Americans Children's books Intensive Care Unit Green Power Organic Raw fish | Spray paint Industrial park/units Vomit Cheap booze Reduced price Mobile phone masts Loyalty cards Cracks/Cracked Diggers Open All Night |
An accoustic song (Sacred) to a dad (family love = Sacred) about a JCB construction digger (Profane).
The JCB Song
Ancient Latin/Greek Affection Flame Old Trees Viola Fountain pens/Quills Grand Canyon Perfect Meringue Seeds and berries Playful flirting | Construction site Electric Guitar Illuminated hoardings Chernobyl Land mines Nightclubs Pigeons Cheating Dirt Bikes Pollution |
Slash from Guns and Roses playing heavy metal solo on an electric guitar (profane, profane, profane) outside, in Church grounds, on a mountain top (sacred, sacred, sacred).
In tune Chicks Medicine Opera House Vets World Championships Olympics School Trip Harvest Baby items | Pepper-spray Loudspeakers/Megaphone Murder Cockroaches Motorway Self-interest Grotesque Bricks Dissolution Out of tune |
Photo of a rock (natural = Sacred) with an LED light embedded in it (technology = Profane)
Or... is it light (Sacred) coming from something hard and dark (Profane)
Waterfall Children's ward Princess Magic Wand Fairies Interests of the group Choir Floral tribute Home-made Juice | Bars Heavy machinery Fluorescent Tumour Alarm Alloy Face mask Napalm Booze Plastic |
Breaking Bad: about a chemistry teacher (Sacred) making drugs (Profane).
Or... "A terminally ill (Sacred)
chemistry (Sacred)
teacher (Sacred)
teams (Sacred)
with a former student (Sacred)
...to manufacture (Profane)
crystal meth (Profane)
to ensure (Profane)
his family's future. (money = Profane)
Cells Survivors Peat Newsletters The 3 women from the Blurred Lines video Aid workers Romantic verse Mathematics Children's hospital Desert Island | The Man Car Parts X-ray Non-stick Party Divorce Sewage Security Bricks Dismembered bodies |
"The pie" from the Oscar winning film, The Help.
Homemade cooking (Sacred)... and its "special ingredient". (Profane)
Algebra Clean page Brain / The server Honey Your name Science Blank canvas Heart surgeons Robes Poetry | Mass-produced Holocaust Street bins/dog poop bins Rats Stripping Rust Mortar Overpass Malfunction eg backfiring or itching Burlesque |
(Do It On My) Twin Bed
Doing it (sex = Profane)
...in your childhood bedroom (family home = Sacred)
Petals Musical instruments Fate Hero Fluffy Grandma Snow Faith Wind Little | Prisoners Buttocks Yellow lines Sex offenders register Ebola Lift shafts Police "Do Not Cross" tape Dust Propaganda Marketing |
Ice Road Truckers.
Ice (nature = Sacred)
Road Truckers (Profane)
Grain Logs Long hair Cotton Honey Whalesong Crown Scientific formulae Sleep The BBC | Hit men Consultants Papparazzi Sex worker Traffic warden Loan shark Critics Wrestlers Burger flipper Executives |
Snow White.
Princess/Royalty (Sacred) in a coffin/death (Profane)
Grass Rose Originality Defender Rock Ice Rest Theatre Hay Fish | Proctologists Credit card Wiring Airports Disguise Bottom Car Death Fast food packaging Prison Van |
The imagery of Stephen Hawking
Brilliant mind and profound Science (Sacred)
...conveyed through a robot voicebox (Profane)
Reading Friendship Dreaming Long-Term Cows Sleep Whispers The Moon Sky Prize | Trust Family home Laughter Community Making love Promise Cwtch Accents Naked Medal |
Steptoe and Son playing scrabble
Funny memorable sitcom scene.
Family game (Sacred) vs. Profanities (Profane)
Language (Sacred) vs. Point scoring at all costs (Profane)
Contribution Whip round Smile Milk Water School Play Hospice Fatherhood Village Clouds | Road markings Hide Trading Accident Diesel Used Car salesmen TV studio Sick Corrugated Multi-storey |
Kitten rolling itself up like a Transformer.
Kitten (sacred)
...folding up into Autobot mode (profane)
Sacred and Profane.
Rememberance Shower Planting Chess Kiss Holidays Christmas Beach Sea Gull Warmth | Crush Cables Hunters Freezer Terms and Conditions Hairy Motorway Bum Tupperware Pig |
Dogs pooing in the back of family photos.
At first sight, it looks like
Family photos (sacred) vs. Excretion (profane)
But it could also be...
Natural behaviour (sacred) vs. Posing (profane)
Dogs (nature=sacred) vs. Photography (technology=profane)
There's a whole load of them online.
Zen Reading Help Cheyenne Suburban Prayer Turf Slow Cottage Order | Copying Trucking Boasting Baubles Kazoo Yelling Whiteboard Pride Air bags |
I'm finding it really difficult to get hold of any more "Sacreds"
- got loads of profanities, for some reason.
So before that well runs completely dry... behold...
Competition winners meeting a Lakers cheerleader
You know it's wrong.
You know it's really funny.
But what is it?
Family photo (sacred) vs. advertising (profane)
or
Pristine (sacred) vs. messy (profane)
or
Real life (sacred) vs. marketing image (profane)
or
Feminine (sacred) vs. Male (profane)
Who cares, there are bunches more here
Cloth Inscription Traditional Silk Bishop Face Kitchen Musical Female Meadow | Gutter Execution Electrolarynx Miserliness Short-Term Projector Adornments Rusty Whip Greed |
Oh Lord, won't you buy me, a Mercedes-Benz
Prayer (sacred),
Oh Lord (sacred)...
with
... Buy me (profane),
a luxury brand car (profane, profane, profane)
Fresh Hair Hug Book Space Egg Heaven Fruit Laughter Drift | Jealousy Anger Lust Laziness Forgetting Boxing Zimmer Frame Photography Mould Outlet |
Dad's Army
Old people (sacred) as fighting soldiers (profane)
Meeting in a Church (sacred) to battle the Nazis (profane)
In a sleepy seaside town (sacred) during World War II (profane)
Baby food Fabric Fluffy Caress Pattern Brother/Sister Tradition Pastel Beauty Geyser | Shootout Nazi Contraception Matt Supersize Power station Filth Warrior Consumer Goods Disorder |
Poetry on estate agents boards
From this brilliant article by Ariane Sherine.
Basically, turns out there's a guy in Kentish Town (near where I grew up in London)...
and he puts his poetry up on estate agents boards outside his house.
It's lovely, and Sacred and Profane.
Poetry (sacred) plus Estate Agents (profane)
Art (sacred) plus Advertising (profane)
Sacred and Profane is a theory that art is more powerful when two ideas from the worlds of the Sacred and the Profane are combined.
So this is it.
My very last list of Sacred and Profane.
And I've ended up with loads more Profanes than Sacreds.
I can't even put them in a nice table box, so here they are as a scrappy list.
Valley Gift Song Unicorn Asked Everybody Mindfulness Careful Painstaking Acclaim Adopting Adventure Alive Bighearted Bloom Bubbles Charity Clean Distinguished Daily Friendship Glow Replenish Spontaneous Beam Cultivate Handsome Jubilation Polish Serene Zest Achievement Activist Connect Cure Esteem Voyage | Muck Vanity Scratched Scowl Processed food Discharge Chains Fad Spree Neon Wages Sudden DJ Tears/Teardrops Netting Telling Nobody Credit card Crazy Mindless Slapdash Notorious Reject Blight Ordeal Small-minded Disconnection Reviled |
Old Spice Muscle Man Music
There's a theory that when you combine the Sacred with the Profane, you conjure up scenes which are even more powerful, compelling or funny.
Here is the Old Spice Muscle Music.
You could look at it as a combination of:
Music (Sacred) and Bodybuilding (Profane)
Or
Music (Sacred) and Technology (Profane)
Or
Music (Sacred) and Shouting (Profane)
And "Flame Sax!" is
Instrument (Sacred) and Flamethrower (Profane)
Or
Fire (Sacred) and Saxophone (Profane)
Anyway, I've spent most of tonight shooting my first Sacred and Profane videos - and I noticed that I put a whole list of sacreds into a list of profanes... so here they are extracted as my final list of sacred and profanes before the first big draw of random combinations next weekend.
Trust Family home Laughter Community Making love Promise Cwtch Accents Naked Medal Signature | Angry voice Actor/Actress Engineer Paint Falling over Dirty Lottery Punk Racism Demon Kill |
Heartlake City, from Lego Friends
There's a theory that you get more powerful artistic ideas when you combine the sacred with the profane.
Like the home to Olivia, Andrea, Emma, Mia and Stephanie... the Lego Friends.
Heartlake City
Heart (sacred) lake (sacred) City (profane)
In a couple of weeks I'll start the weekly draw to combine different sacreds and profanes, but first I need the sacreds on cards to pull from the hat. (It won't be a hat. At the moment, in my head it's two Jiffy bags... but just thought I could get something better. Like a helmet for the profanes. And er, something nice for the sacreds. A sea grass basket. Or a leaf bowl.)
Anyway, here is every sacred I came up with last year.
Except my action camera cuts itself out after 25 minutes.
It's a Ricoh feature, that I only realised after 40 minutes.
Most of them are on here, so you get the jist.
My list of every sacred word for the Sacred and Profane weekly draw
Jerry Seinfeld's Pop Tarts Routine
Jerry Seinfeld talks about how he writes a routine, but the Pop Tarts one he uses as an example has lots and lots of sacred and profane combinations:
Jerry Seinfeld Interview: How to Write a Joke | The New York Times
as a kid (childhood=sacred) back of head blowing off (disfigurement=profane)
orange juice (sacred) hack at with a knife (profane)
committing a murder before you got on the school bus (sacred and profane)
wrapping your lips (sacred) around a wood-chipper (profane)
chimps (sacred) in the dirt (profane), playing (sacred) with sticks (profane)
I've now written out all my Profanes - it doesn't feel right calling them profanities, because words themselves are Sacred.
Here they are ready for the first draw week after next, I think
My list of every profane word for the Sacred and Profane weekly draw - Part One
The Good Life
On the surface it looks like...
Civilization (Sacred) disrupted by Farmyard noises and smells (Profane)
Or Being comfortable (Sacred) VS. Being miserly and struggling (Profane)
But the genius of it as an idea for a sitcom (or even drama) series is that maybe, instead, it could be seen as...
The Countryside (Sacred) VS. Surburbia (Profane)
Or
Living off the Land (Sacred) VS. The Rat Race, and Working for The Man (Profane)
Stephen King when asked how he came up wth such imaginative ideas for his stories:
“I still have the heart of a little boy... in a jar on my desk.”
SACRED - heart, little boy
PROFANE - container, jar, desk, workplace
Anyway, here is the final list of profanities that have gone into the profane pile.
I should work out Sacred and Profane containers for these.
Maybe a food bowl for the Sacreds, and a potty for the Profanes.
I think I'm definitely going to do that. I hope I remember.
Remind me if I forget.
My list of every profane word I can think of for the Sacred and Profane weekly draw - Part 2
Ween - The HIV Song
Sudden Valley from Arrested Development
Slightly different list: ART or NOT ART
ART:
freedom,
territory,
friends,
collaborators,
lovers,
promises,
flow,
patience,
change,
kindness,
generosity
NOT ART:
sign-off,
clients,
contracts,
charges,
minimum service level agreement,
deadlines,
urgency,
hierarchy,
specs,
scope of work,
salary,
overtime
Either ways, it all works, and tees up time for my first Sacred and Profane draw.
Let's see how this is going to work out.
I'll pull out 10 words for 5 combinations,
and then wiggle them around to see if there's an even better combination of 10.
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