Wednesday, 21 March 2018

What if someone is up my bumper so I just stop the car? #PowerDaydream



I overthink everything to make the world a happier place

What if someone is up my bumper so I just stop the car?

Night time. Neil and Long-Suffering Wife (LSW) are in the car on the A272.
The kids are in the back.

NEIL
He is right up my bum.

The kids giggle.

NEIL
Wherever I go...

REAR VIEW MIRROR: Headlights up the rear bumper.

NEIL
I am always in the way.

LSW
Why not stop the car.

NEIL
Stop the car?

LSW
Stop the car.

NEIL
Here?

LSW
Your driving’s annoying him anyway.

Neil safely brings the car to a complete stop.

NEIL
He doesn’t know what to do.

The Peugeot waits behind.

LSW
So do nothing.

The Peugeot screeches round him with the driver leaning yelling abuse as he speeds off.

LSW
Byeeee.

NEIL
See ya.
(flashing lights like a 3 year old)
Eh - eh.

LSW
No, that’s not how it--

The Peugeot stops dead.

NEIL
Huh. Sorry.
(they're stuck)
Ugh.

Neil pulls in so the confused drivers now pulling up behind him edge round and block in the Peugeot.

LSW
You just can’t help yourself can you.

6 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER
Can we go home now?

NEIL
In a minute.

LSW
Daddy’s just annoying somebody.

NEIL
Look, they’re annoyed at him now.

Neil turns round to the back of the car for this pearl.

NEIL
Kids, always always always quit while you’re ahead.

6 YEAR OLD
Or get a lift from someone else.


Previous post...
What if I teach my kids the true meaning of Mothers Day. #PowerDaydream


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