Tuesday, 21 November 2017

Visiting Santas Sexy Helper #DadDirt



The Store’s Christmas Grotto is about to open - a line of JADED DADS with KIDS wait for the rope barrier to be lifted.

They perk up when in crosses...

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
Come closer everybody. Santa’s nearly here!

SANTA crosses in to take his seat in the Grotto.

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
Oh. Santa’s here now.
After a whole year of waiting.
(to DAD and KID #1)
In you go.

They go into the curtained off Grotto.

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
A whole year of waiting.
And there he is.
We haven’t seen him since the Grotto works party on December 24th.
But - here - he - is.

She sends in DAD and KID #2

SANTA (O.S.)
Is everything ho-ho-ho okay out there?

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
Oh, yes. Everything’s just fine.

She sends in DAD and KID #3 in a huff.

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
I mean, why wouldn’t it be.
You didn’t call.
Because of all your important Santa business.

SANTA appeaers at the Grotto curtain door.
The line of kids and Dads cheers.

SANTA
Ho ho ho!
I ho ho don’t know what’s go, go, going on.

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
No it’s fine. I’ve moved on from last year.

She pushes DAD #5 onto Santa’s grotto chair and sits on his lap.

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
What would you like on the tree this year?

She jiggles about on the Dad.

SANTA
(on the side)
You’re ruining the Grotto for everybody.

ALL THE DADS
No - we’re fine/ Super okay with this/ You take all the time you need/ Can I go next?

DADS start tossing gifts to Santa’s Sexy Helper.

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
You can’t have this, like last year.
Glad you didn’t call now?

SANTA
(to crowd)
Santa needs to check on Rudolph.
No, I don’t mean it like that.
Reindeer checking.
(to Santa’s Sexy Helper)
Round the back of the Grotto.

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
Oh so now your memory’s coming back.

Santa’s Sexy Helper stomps in a huff round to the back of the grotto.

SANTA
It’s my first day - they said you’d be helping.

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
You’re - not the same.

SANTA
Same as what?!
None of this is in the guide.

She holds Santa’s arms. Genuine.

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
I am so sorry. I’ve got completely the wrong guy.

SANTA
So we’re going back to the Grotto.

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
I just need to know.
Are you going to the Christmas Party?
December 24th?

But Santa has gone.

SANTA’S SEXY HELPER
I'll take that as a maybe.


Previous post...
Teaching my son to touch type. Is there any point? #DadDirt


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