Thursday, 10 November 2016

My girlfriend wanted me to go to the clap clinic, but there was nothing wrong with me #BRITISHDADSTUFF

You know that you are a Great British Dad...
...when your sexual history is ancient history.

I ended up telling my LSW (Long-Suffering Wife) a story I don't think I told her before.

And now I'm only writing this because she said "You should put that on your blog."

It's about a girlfriend who was a Nurse.

Everything was "okay", but she still insisted that I go to the clap clinic to make sure everything was okay, even though everything was okay.

I know what you're thinking: that's completely the responsible thing to suggest and do.

I could be walking around riddled with all sorts.

Just to make it clear here, like I can't make it even clearer, I'm not.

But it made me question everything in the relationship.

Why would I go and get the all-clear like some kind of skin-flick Gunther.

Would we have to do this regularly?

Is it like some kind of car service, would she base it on time or mileage?

I don't even get the car serviced.

Aren't the little check-ups enough?

Anyway this was a hundred years ago and my exhaust hasn't fallen off.

I'm glad I'm not in that game any more.

The surprising bit is that the story hasn't come up ever in our relationship.

Turns out two kids and 13 years counts as a full service history.

My complete guide to Understanding Your British Dad is coming together here

Previous post...
Have I got the right ticket? I'm going on the run! A #BRITISHDADSTUFF adventure story

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1 comment:

  1. I'm not so sure this post will show up in the search engines so much, so if you found it... hello!


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