Monday, 26 September 2016

How I got a load of Stikeez from the Lidl Basingstoke - #BritishDadStuff

You know that you are a Great British Dad...
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This place is gorgeous - a pristine stand alone temple to the Germanic Lidl Ideal.

The car park couldn’t be bigger, but yet was rammed with eager Lidl addicts like us - parking on the very kerbstones around the building - because they can't get themselves any closer to the Mother, sorry Mutter Ship.

We managed to sail into a huge Parent & Child space while my wife popped in for some honey-roast peanuts, rocket, rolls and most important of all, Stikeez for the kids.

Where did the Stikeez come from?

Every Lidl I go to, I stand behind a long line of grown people who each - at the end of their payment - then have to sheepishly ask for their Stikeez allocation (1 for every 10 pounds spent).

They are more addictive than Nectar points.

And say what you like about the Stikeez, but they don’t data mine you like a Tesco Clubcard.

Woah, hang on - our Stikeez are talking to each other? If the Stikeez are Lidl informants, it would probably make us love Lidl only even more.

Anyway, I missed out on all of this while stuck (or Stikeezed) in the car with the two kids, watching the angry childless couples scowling from their white 4x4 BMWs sprawled all over the other Parent & Child parking spaces.

Why are they all so angry?

Why do they have to go everywhere so quickly?

They seem pretty pleased with their wheels.
Why don’t they want to go slower and spend more time in them?

They’re on “attack mode” in their Stormtrooper cars - so they think I’m frowning at them and their oafish parking, but I’m not.

Maybe I’m looking at them longingly as my kids roll around in the boot with their feet in the air, flipping the radio between Classic FM and Fun Kids Live.

Anyway, this Lidl must be really good because my Wife’s in there for 40 minutes to get the nuts, rocket, rolls and Stikeez. Which the brilliant checkout assistant supplied generously and bountifully.

Thank you.

Five stars.

The full review, photo and five stars are here.

My complete guide to Understanding Your British Dad is coming together here

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Getting a new computer and unboxing my dwindling manhood - #BritishDadStuff

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