Tuesday, 19 May 2015

Companies want to see 2 utility bills on paper. But also want to stop sending out bills on paper. Heres my terrible Utility Bill Song

Love how companies want to stop posting paper bills...

...at exactly same time every company also insists on seeing "2 Utility Bills" as proof of ID.

The problem is now ours. Thanks.

Our 2 utility bills that we have clung onto have become precious in our house.

So precious, we keep them in a special cabinet.

We should name them.

Trying to write a song about this.

The lyrics I've got are:

We're your two utility bills.
You keep us under lock and key.
For those evil sods at the credit check agency.

They know my nob size - and browsing history...
But they still want to see my two utility bills.

We're so very rare.
We're like William Hague's hair.

So very rare.
Like a reasonable train fare.

If your application's crap.
We've got a proper trap.
You'll never find us.
We're not on any map.

Bits of paper.
It's a proper caper.
We just want to find - our - two - where - are - you - U - tility Bills.

All my British Dad stuff is here

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