Wednesday, 7 March 2018
What if my son is finally ready to learn the facts of life. That you don’t talk about them in public. #PowerDaydream
I overthink everything to make the world a happier place:
What if my son is finally ready to learn the facts of life. That you don’t talk about them in public.
Neil is in the kitchen with his Long-Suffering Wife (LSW).
I think he’s ready. To find out about that kind of stuff. Everything.
I didn’t tell you about what happened last Summer.
We were in the queue at the station. It was packed - the ticket office - really long line...
And he goes, really loudly:
“Daddy... Your willy has gone all big!”
But it hadn’t.
It was just my shorts.
The chunky cream ones.
Right. The tan ones. The fabric’s really thick so, you know, they bulge there.
“Daddy - your willy’s gone all big.”
What did you say?
I can’t remember. I don’t want to remember.
So now I’m stuck.
If I deny it, it looks like I’m lying, and covering it up.
But if you don’t say anything...
It means I’ve got a hard on in the train queue.
In front of my kid.
You do like trains though.
It was the shorts.
So that’s what you said.
I think so. I would’ve said something.
And then looked like you’re completely covering it up.
We’ve got to tell him. I think he’s ready.
I’m not sure more information’s going to help this.
Neither am I. Maybe we could just... tell him absolutely everything.
Overwhelm him into silence.
Like everyone in the station.
What if I get the doorbell that rings on my phone wherever I am in the world? #PowerDaydream
All about me, and getting these by email.