Thursday, 1 March 2018

What if I get the doorbell that rings on my phone wherever I am in the world? #PowerDaydream

I overthink everything to make the world a happier place and this is what I overthunk today:

What if I got one of those video doorbells that rings on your phone wherever you are in the world?

It’s a doorbell with a camera so you can see who’s on your doorstep when you’re not there.

This combines my twin loves of spending money and staring out of the window.

What I love about it is that it finally makes my doorstep one more place of fear.

It’s to protect my house, but it costs 150 quid, so now they can just steal the overpriced doorbell.

Better than that - the thief can call me from anywhere in the world.
“Ding dong! Hello. Yeah. Still got it.”

But I hate answering the door.
It’s like I never get there quick enough, so this doorbell link would mean I could stall them while I saunter over... instead of doing that thing where I make a lot of noise getting there so they don’t leave a card.

Be awful if it’s some police officer trying to bring me tragic news.
And I’m just there bellowing back from my app while I’m on the toilet.
"Car crash? Hang on... gnnnn."

And I'm so cheap, I'd probably end up using it as our family camera.
"Smile everybody! Ding dong!"

I think it works by linking to our Wi-Fi, but I’m not sure about putting our house on the web.
I've got the fridge on Youtube doing unboxing videos.
All our food’s going off.
The central heating's trashed my upgrades on Toon Blast.
And the toaster’s trolling me on Linkedin.
I don't care what it says on the profile.
It's not a "Thought Leader".

Previous post...
What if I change all President Donald Trump tweet exclamations into question marks? (And 9 other major improvements for happiness) #PowerDaydream

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