Friday, 27 October 2017

Don’t Trust Anything That Mummy Says #DadDirt




SON is changing from his wellies to trainers while MUM and DAD are standing over him.
It’s taking weeks.

MUM
Come on, let’s get to the Heath.
We’ll see if those tyres are still on the trees.

SON
What tyres?

MUM
The ones you can swing on.

SON
There aren’t any tyres.

MUM
You swung on them last time we went.

SON
No I didn’t.

MUM
But you were swinging on them.
There was that archaeological dig next to it.

SON
The seats are just sticks.

MUM
Really?

DAD
Never trust anything Mummy says.

SON
There aren’t any tyres.

DAD
Is there an archaelogical dig there?

MUM
I could’ve sworn they were tyres.

DAD
Or was it just two men. Burying a dog.

MUM
There’s definitely a dig going on.

DAD
(quotes diggers)
“Oh, yeah. It’s ‘archaeology’.
We’re just waiting for the funding to come through.”

MUM
Well. That just goes to show.
How our memory changes things.

DAD
Don’t trust anything - anything - that we say.

SON
I don’t.


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