Tuesday, 28 February 2017

Data gathering by big companies will slander my Wife for having a pointy head #BritishDadStuff



You know you are a Great British Dad when...
...you treat yourself to the next episode of the box set that is your Wife’s dreams.


(NB guess this is the sequel to her being-boxed-in-our-sideways-house nightmare)

INT. OUR BEDROOM - EARLY MORNING

DAUGHTER is performing a puppet show at the end of the bed with all her soft toys and an American accent.

My LONG-SUFFERING WIFE turns to me with her “WICKED - the Musical” mug of tea (that she made for herself).

LSW:
You know all that data the companies are gathering on us? I had a dream last night that some cosmetics company had it on their file that I had a pointy head.

ANGLE ON: Me. I have nowhere to go with this.
With my “I AM THE ONE WHO KNOCKS” mug of tea. (That she made for me).

LSW:
And I found out because I went to another cosmetics company, and they said that I couldn’t have their product because I have a pointy head. And I’m telling them that I don’t have a pointy head, but I’m in their system as having a pointy head so I can’t have the product. And then I said, look, you can see that I don’t have a pointy head, but that wasn’t good enough. So I had to provide photographic proof that my head isn’t pointy, and when they get that, they changed my details to say that I don’t have a pointy head.

ME:
Did you get the product.

LSW:
Yes.

ME:
That’s brilliant. Can I write that down?

LSW:
Okay.

ME:
If I publish it, then it’s out there that your head isn’t pointy.

LSW:
That’s okay.

ME:
I’m just data-gathering.


Previous post...
Its at times like this I think, what would the women from the Blurred Lines video do? and other British Dad Thoughts 99-105 #BritishDadStuff


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