Tuesday, 11 October 2016
I'm the Wing Mirror Man, the 5th Emergency Service #BritishDadStuff
You know that you are a Great British Dad...
...when you find yourself giving minor acts of roadside assistance away for free.
I was in the carpark at B&Q and I was already on edge, because my son was playing around with something - beating it into the floor (by the way, when did we stop enjoying doing that, as men? Just hitting something on the ground as hard as we can for the fun of it. I miss that.)
I heard a shout for me coming from a car.
"Excuse me!" shouted the driver of the 4x4.
I moved over, convinced he was going to point out something about my kid.
Why I was moving over to hear this, and how is this a better idea than dealing with my kid, I still don't know...
...but I lean towards his open window.
"Could you pull my wing mirror out please?"
He meant the one on the passenger side- my side - and chuckled that he was sorry, but he couldn't be bothered to go round and pull it out for himself.
Right, here's the bit I don't get.
I pulled out the wing mirror.
He pulled away.
(Away from my son still giving the floor what for).
How can you go through life getting people to do the stuff you can't be arsed to do?
I was in awe.
It would never cross my mind to beckon someone over - to get them to pull out my wing mirror - instead of me getting out to do it myself.
Calling someone over, was easier for him, than doing it himself.
What kind of magician is this?
And what about me? What is going on in my world that I'd do that for him.
Any other minor fixes I can do for you?
Getting yelled at some petrol station to do up your petrol cap?
I'm like some kind of Downton Abbey pedestrian butler, attending to master's automotive needs.
Do you want me to check your tyre pressures too?
I can stretch to that.
Just make sure you shout loud enough.
What am I, some kind of Community Support AA Man?
And it's in front of my kid.
I'm this close to wiping windscreens before the lights turn green.
My complete guide to Understanding Your British Dad is coming together here
How can I tell my kids... Nobody Cares About Your Opinion #BritishDadStuff
(Hollering from an open window): "Could you subscribe to my blog by email please? All you've got to do is click here. Thanks!"