Sunday, 15 May 2016
"You're missing the point!" and the laziest comment on the Internet
There's something I see all the time on the Internet, and it's so dumb - so lazy - that I want to do something every time I read it.
But I know that reaction right there means I've already lost.
So why bother.
But I'm going to try and do it now.
Because I don't know what I am trying to win.
And I don't know why I am spending time on this.
But here I am.
So here goes.
Wish me luck!
"You're missing the point."
"You're completely missing the point."
No... No, I'm pretty much done.
"But he misses the point entirely..."
No, really, I got down what I wanted to put, but thanks.
"It's a crucial point missed."
Okay - this is important... You're telling us that not only have we written something incorrectly...
But that we did it so badly that we didn't even mention that thing that you - a complete stranger - wanted us to write?
I don't get it. I feel terrible, obviously.
But I don't get it.
Whenever "missing the point" comes up - it's pretty much always on something that someone put out into the world.
It's out there.
And it hurts no-one.
And maybe it's just a thought on a subject that they thought was worth writing about, or exploring or something they're just sharing.
But they "missed the point."
And you're so incensed about this - that you've finally had to speak up.
And put them right on not writing that thing that you didn't write.
In a way that's so lazy that you're going flip a 4 word shorthand to nail that image of you, with your arms folded, pronouncing judgement, on the thing that we didn't type for you.
But I don't think that's what really winds me up about "you're missing the point".
Because I get that "you're missing the point" is to wind us up with a deliberate tic.
It's like "chillax."
The beauty of chillax though is that it's cheekily obnoxious - because it's ordering you to lighten up - with a word that would wind anyone up. So in a weird way it's about bringing you together, because it deliberately back-handedly acknowledges your wound up state.
"You're missing the point" though is about saying "you're over there, and I'm here, and you've failed - because you're not doing what I can't even be bothered to do myself."
Well, there's a really easy fix for that.
And that's to say thank you.
Maybe I'll remember now to stop looking for bones to pick - that took about the same amount of time to think through as type this sentence.
I missed the point.
I'm now going to try and spend some more time, and focus some more energy, on missing some more points.
And who knows.
Perhaps I'll find the courage to do that, instead of being here in the comments.
(see also: "baffled")
My complete guide to Understanding Your British Dad that's work-in-progress
Sid Caesar on writing comedy at the dawn of Television #scriptchat
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